Wednesday, October 06, 2010

Sale To Nature!

I sold my story, Steve Sepp, Tasty! Tasty! (story 128) to Nature! "Wait," you say, "Isn't that a science journal (Maybe the science journal)?" It is, but they leave a little room in the back for a flash-fiction piece. They've also published Arthur C. Clarke, Bruce Sterling and currently, my Twitter pal, Polenth Blake. As Bart Simpson might say, "I am so juzzed!"

I've got a sneaking suspicion that this qualifies as my third pro-sale as far as SFWA is concerned. If so, we may be hooking up soon.

As a bit of icing, I sent off 129 last week.

Sunday, October 03, 2010

Now I Am A Gazelle

If you missed my prancing, see here: http://theonethousand.blogspot.com/2010/07/prancing-through-bookstore.html

A couple of days ago, a guy at the store asked for something and as we walked back to get it he said, "Man, you must have been an athlete. You move like a gazelle!" Certainly the first time I've ever heard those words. And I'm quite confident that he wasn't hitting on me. If this keeps up, people will demand to see video of me walking around.

The magnificent Harlan Ellison says that he is dying: http://www.isthmus.com/isthmus/article.php?article=30610 Which makes me a sad gazelle. You can listen to my open letter to Harlan Ellison on this subject here at the very beginning of the latest episode of StarShipSofa's Aural Delights: http://www.starshipsofa.com/20100929/aural-delights-no-156-robert-reed/

If you want to read my latest published work, head over to Twitter where Grant Stone's embryonic fanzine, b0t, is tweeting my Twitter serial, CITY1. One part is being released each day in October. Look: http://twitter.com/b0tzine If you're not familiar with Twitter, you'll have to read those posts (marked with the hashtag #CITY1) from the bottom up.

Wednesday, September 29, 2010

My Casino Cameo

I make a brief appearance at http://www.casinoonline.co.uk this week. The article is The Top 50 Gambling Books of All Time. As I've gained world-renown for tweeting about Casino Royale, editor Holly Emblem asked if I could talk about the novel as a whole in a single tweet. I did, and you can read the results here:

http://www.casinoonline.co.uk/book-reviews/top-50-gambling-books


This is essential reading for the Matthew Sanborn Smith completist and it's free and it will only take a couple of seconds of your life. Go read.

Tuesday, September 21, 2010

127, 128

Welcome new followers Robyn, Baedon and Philipp!

Stories 127 and 128 are out the door. I feel this news would be slightly more interesting if I gave you the titles as well, but now I'm all paranoid and think some editors might give enough of a crap to Google titles I send them and if they see the story's been floating around for months, they'll figure they didn't get it first and will be offended and will reject my story on that basis alone. It's all very stupid of me.

I'll have another story or two done in the next few days. I've really got to crank it now if I'm going to make my goal of 52 in 2010. Right now that's 9 stories for the year, 43 to go!

Wednesday, September 08, 2010

Maisy's Many Souls

My latest story, Maisy's Many Souls (number 75 of The One-Thousand) is available in GUD magazine's issue #6! You can score yourself a copy here: http://www.gudmagazine.com/vault/6

So you know, It's not one of my happy/funny/pleasant stories which Mango fans might expect.

I often like to do the story behind the story, which I'll do here and now. You can come back and read this after you've read the story if you want, there are some minor spoilers here.


The story behind Maisy's Many Souls

I come up with story ideas in a lot of ways, one way being to write a bunch of silly sounding phrases down and see if they inspire something. This time, one of the things I wrote was, "Maisy had jars," and I looked at that and wondered what Maisy had in those jars. I decided she had souls in those jars and then I decided they were on circuit boards.

I wanted a little conflict so I created a human rights guy (that's the technical term) who wants to protect those souls and he's got a partner. Maybe they're a different sort of partners. Then I wanted to throw one more element in to make things interesting. His partner makes sculptures out of light. And that was it. I was off to the races with four or five sentences. If you've read the story, you'll know there's one more rather major idea, but that wouldn't come to me until later.

I wrote a huge chunk of this story on my AlphaSmart 3000 while waiting around at my job while off the clock because I had ordered my iPod and had it sent there to avoid shenanigans. So one of the things I did while waiting for FedEx was to hole myself up in an office and write. This worked marvelously because there were no distractions and no internet and I wrote some great stuff. I was in a flow which was mostly dialogue. Once I get into conflict, it's usually all dialogue in the first draft and then I fill in other stuff later. I realized something was happening in this story, I had risen above the plateau I'd been on for quite some time. Something new and interesting was coming out of me and the characters were coming alive.

I realized something else. I was onto some dark shit. It wasn't horror, but I was getting inside these people and not liking what was there. The whole story made me uncomfortable and when I reread it two weeks ago, not having read it for fifteen months, it still made me feel uncomfortable. I showed it around and got some really positive reactions but everyone agreed that one of the characters made a decision near the end that just wasn't believable.

My thanks to friend and writing compadre Grant Stone who gave me the solution. I immediately forgot it, tried a couple of things and finally hit on something that worked. It was only after I went back to Grant's e-mail that I found I had done exactly what he told me.

Thanks to Colleen Leong who liked the story so much she made me believe it was really good.

Thanks to the gang at GUD magazine, a very nice bunch of people with whom I hope I can work in the future.

Finally, thanks to Mike Ramshaw who passed away earlier this year. Mike was a co-worker (Like Colleen) and a dear friend and I loved him. I wish I could have given him a big hug before he died. Mike was a great writer who never got around to sending his work out to publishers. He was the best first reader any writer could ask for. He questioned everything from the use of a particular semi-colon to the major themes of a story and everything in between. And he wasn't afraid to tell you when something was awful. His extensive notes and our ensuing discussion helped flesh out lots of little details in Maisy. Maisy's kitchen came alive because of Mike and the Kiss-Me-Quick T shirt was all his.

Thanks, Mike.

Thursday, August 26, 2010

Casino Royale On The Great Twitter Bond Read

I'm not sure why any of you would care, but I'm posting most of the tweets from The Great Twitter Bond Read here because Twitter can't be bothered to archive them for more than a few days. I say 'most' because I missed a few early ones, things from others I forgot to retweet, and also most of the tweets in which I asked others to join in. The tweets without attribution are from me, @upwithgravity.

The tweets in this post mostly concern Casino Royale. I'll be collecting the tweets book by book. @steveattwitter jumped forward many books to For Your Eyes Only. I'm collecting those tweets, but unless you're following the #bondread tag, you won't see those until I get to that book. Please join in and add your own tweets, either related to specific books or other Bondian stuff. Sorry about all the #bondread tags below. I'm not going to remove them all.

The Great Twitter Bond Read presents Casino Royale:


Join the Great Twitter Bond Read! http://is.gd/dVrh6 Please RT! #bondread

First up, Casino Royale (CR for tweeting), 1953. Read it twice before. The film's quite faithful in some ways. #bondread

upwithgravity @fabiofernandes Yes, Craig's Bond is quite the thug, which I like. #bondread

#bondread RT @ChurchHTucker @upwithgravity Which CR is faithful? I'm guessing the last one.

upwithgravity @ChurchHTucker Good guess. The David Niven CR is rather less faithful. ; ) But the TV version before Dr. No was probably good. #bondread

1st challenge of the Great Twitter Bond Read: Prying CR from my Bond boxed set. It's really wedged in there! #bondread

RT @skellyrocker Do you ekshpect me to tweet? No Mr Bond I expect you to text! #bondread

CR c1 'The Secret Agent' Leave Fr. casino, up 3 mil. Le Chiffre's there. B's so bad-ass even his hair does hotel counter-espionage #bondread

#bondread RT@SylvioGoncalves JB Theme, por Monty Norman. Original http://digi.to/IbZg3 Bond Band http://digi.to/W9nm8 #grandestemasdefilmes

Read Bond. See the world. Read my tweets. In Bondian circle of life, he fills both wombs and graves. Death and Pussy Galore! #bondread

You can also follow @georgelazenby an actual Bond and very entertaining tweeter. #bondread

CR c2 'Dossier for M' Le Chiffre buys whorehouses w/ 50 mil in Soviet cash. Then whores outlawed. Oops! Break him B! Also - SMERSH #bondread

CR c3 'Number 007' Flashback. Head of S sells M on plan to out-gamble Le Chiffre. B has doubts. Do it anyway. M stands for Mutha? #bondread

#bondread RT @ChurchHTucker @upwithgravity Theres an S *and* an M? Kinky.

upwithgravity @ChurchHTucker If only there was an M and an M. Tasty. #bondread

CR c4 'L'Ennemi Écoute' B's blown (not in a good way)! Mathis shows, ruins commie eardrums & tells B his partner is - A WOMAN! No! #bondread

steveattwitter So JB is a 70/day smoker then. About to start ch5 of CR,The girl from HQ #bondread

upwithgravity @steveattwitter If he could die at any time, I understand 70 cigs a day, but how does he chase people? #bondread

steveattwitter @upwithgravity I guess that's why he needs 4.5 litre Bentley. #bondread

CR c5 'The Girl From Headquarters' History of Royale. You won't believe this - B digs Vesper! He reminds her of http://is.gd/e3BVk #bondread

Oops! Forgot to mention there's a big explosion at the end of chapter 5. Some of you may have felt that was important. #bondread

CR c6 'Two men In Straw Hats' The old bomb-in-the-camera-case trick! Saved by the tree. Mathis races off to find a roaming Bulgar. #bondread

CR c7 'Rouge Et Noir' Gettin' ready for the game. B does a little roulette. Wins a mil. Meets Felix Leiter. Gets his booze shaken. #bondread

steveattwitter CR page 50: first occurance ever of the classic line/spoken name "Bond - James Bond" #bondread

steveattwitter Then the Dry Martini on the next page. Curiously in a deep champaign goblet though rather than the martini glass of the films #bondread

CR c8 'Pink Lights And Champagne' Ready for action. Dinner w/ Vesper, smokin' in blk velvet. B explains his gastronomic philosophy #bondread

steveattwitter Avocado pears to follow the caviar and steak courses; very exotic for the post war rationed 1949 reader. #bondread

CR c9 'The Game Is Baccarat' The Bulgar bombers were double-crossed! B explains Baccarat. Vesper warms at dinner and B grows cold. #bondread

CR c10 'The High Table' B dumps Vesper on Felix. The big game is on! Greek gets it rolling & B makes his first attack on the bank. #bondread

CR c11 'Moment Of Truth' B comes on strong, then loses everything! Why don't you hand over our nuclear secrets while you're at it? #bondread

CR c12 'The Deadly Tube' CIA funds B & the game continues. B gets a poke in the ass with a cane-gun. A chair back-flip saves him. #bondread

CR c13 'A Whisper Of Love, A Whisper of Hate' B cleans out Le Chiffre at Baccarat. Champagne! B focuses on Vesper, hides winnings. #bondread

CR c14 'La Vie En Rose?' Breakfast w/ Vesper, who's now cold. V's called away by a message from Mathis. Sham! And she's kidnapped! #bondread

steveattwitter CR Ch 15: "With the choke full out, the engine answered at once to the starter..." definitely not a Ford or a Vauxhall then. #bondread

CR c15 'Black Hare And Grey Hound' B gives chase by car & curses V who is tied by her own dress. Le Chiffre lays a trap and waits. #bondread

CR c16 'The Crawling Of The Skin' B hits trap and crashes! Captured by Le Chiffre, taken to his villa. B fights, gets beaten down. #bondread

steveattwitter CR ch 16: apparently in 1953 ju-jitsu was the only form of foreign marshal art known to the british secret service, very exotic .#bondread

steveattwitter Which would be the least comfortable? 1953 rubber coated flex or modern pvc flex. #bondread

steveattwitter CR ch 17: are Bond's enemies all electricians on their day jobs? They seem to have copious amounts of electrical flex #bondread

steveattwitter Umm... Looks like electrical flex is going to be the least of Bond's worries if this goes down the way its looking #bondread

CR c17 'My Dear Boy' L tortures B. Serious ball-beating. As a kid, thought he beat B's ass. Guess I couldn't bear the alternative. #bondread

discorobot @upwithgravity It's impossible to compose a tweet that sounds like the Bond theme. So just imagine that I did. #bondread

upwithgravity Oops! Meant to put #bondread on the end of that! RT @upwithgravity @discorobot Ba-da Da-DAH Ba-dahdah!

discorobot @upwithgravity Gold-FINGGGGAAAA #bondread

CR c18 'A Crag-Like Face' SMERSH agent puts bullet in Le Chiffre's head just before L can cut off B's dingle! Then marks B's hand. #bondread

CR c19 'The White Tent' B sleeps 2 days, wakes in French care. Mathis gives him the low down. Good guys happy, bad guys not happy. #bondread

CR c20 'The Nature Of Evil' B decides to quit, defends Evil. Mathis mocks him & says B will protect his loved ones when necessary. #bondread

#bondread RT @atfmb This is cool- Didn't know that DC Comics had an option to a James Bond Comic: http://bit.ly/d7mIb6

CR c21 'Vesper' B asks to see V. Hopes he can still get it up. V tells of her kidnapping. He forgives her and she makes a promise. #bondread

CR c22 'The Hastening Saloon' B's falling for Vesper. Back on his feet, they find a little place in the country. She acts anxious. #bondread

CR c23 'Tide of Passion' No gentle lover, B. 18 chapters of frustration & V puts him off. He swims, gets naked, makes his mind up. #bondread

#bondread My favorite bit of chapter 23? " . . . the shadows had already engulfed his distant pyjamas . . ."

steveattwitter CR ch 23: Bond's covalescing by the sea with Vesper, doctor say's he's well now; what could possibly go wrong? #bondread

CR c24 'Fruit Défendu' B and V have wonderful dinner. V slips now and again into strange dark behavior. B wants to propose to her. #bondread

#bondread Damn. I didn't mention that Bond and Vesper finally got it on in chapter 24, hence the title. Why do I forget the best stuff?

CR c25 'Black-Patch' V makes mysterious phone call. Things turn sour, bickering begins. V is terrified of a man with an eye-patch. #bondread

CR c26 'Sleep Well, My Darling' V's up to more mysterious stuff. She gets scared, gets happy, gets miserable. Has B set her right? #bondread

#bondread Tomorrow is the last chapter of Casino Royale. Finish it tonight, because I spoil the shit out of this book!

#bondread About to wrap up Casino Royale for The Great Twitter Bond Read. Brace yourselves!

SPOILER! #bondread SPOILER!

CR c27 'The Bleeding Heart' V suicides! She was a double-agent. She loved B. B doesn't love her anymore. B declares war on SMERSH. #bondread

#bondread SPOILER! #bondread

steveattwitter Casino Royale done: On last 2 pages Flemming smashes you over the head with the blunt instrument that drives Bond thru the sequels #bondread

#bondread Overall, CR's a good book, even 3rd time around. Loved the Baccarat showdown and the ending. Love that B's not superhuman. Read it

#bondread Tomorrow we begin (or at least I begin) Live And Let Die.

Sunday, August 22, 2010

Free Major Karnage E-Book!

YOU ONLY HAVE UNTIL AUGUST 25TH!

Hurry over to here: http://news.wowio.com/fb01/ Like Wowio on Facebook and get a free e-book edition of Gord Zajac's ass-kicking Major Karnage! I posted about this a few months back and I'm reposting the vid here to remind you how crazy awesome it is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PxRQXQCef_U

Friday, August 20, 2010

I'm Irregular! (Please Pass The Bran Muffins)

Welcome to new followers BlueSquidProductions and Simon H! What were you thinking?

Today I was inducted into the hallowed halls of the SF Signal Irregulars! SF Signal is one of the absolute best blogs out there and they went and gave me keys to the washroom. Little did they know that I consider flushing optional. If you're not familiar with SF Signal, go check it out. It releases piles of awesome science fiction news, reviews, videos, links and other stuff every single day. I'll be repodcasting episodes of Beware the Hairy Mango there and, if the mood strikes me, posting other science fiction related stuff. You'll also get to hear my sultry voice tossing out bon mots on future eps of the funky fresh SF Signal podcast. Cool-a-mundo!

In writing goal news (52 in 2010), I have to finish 45 stories in 133 days! That's flippin' crazy! I'm reworking what's realistic and what's not in preparing for the final third of the year. Many of the remaining stories will probably be shorter than originally planned. I'm pushing some of the ones that need too much work into my 104 in 2011 file. (That's right!) I've got 27 stories in various states of completion, so I need to whip up 18 more between now and Dec. 31st. Head down. Push on.

Off to do #bondread!

Friday, August 13, 2010

Beautiful Stories for Ugly Children



Welcome to new follower Keith! He's a Mangophile! My second favorite kind of phile!

Just want to get this out before I die, because it's already been twenty years: Go find copies of Dave Louapre's and Dan Sweetman's brilliant thirty issue run of Beautiful Stories for Ugly Children, one of a slew of groundbreaking comic titles born of the 1980s. The titles alone should make you smile and if not, check out the cover gallery. The above pic is the cover of issue #1 (but you probably figured that out because you're clever), entitled A Cotton Candy Autopsy in which a group of clowns go on a drunken crime spree. I so wish I still had my collection.

Saturday, July 31, 2010

Join The Great Twitter Bond Read!

I'm going to be reading all of the Ian Fleming James Bond books and twittering about them chapter by chapter. If you want to read along or just read what I have to say, get on Twitter and follow me @upwithgravity .

I was going to tag it #gtbr but that's already taken by the Great Texas Balloon Race. I'm serious. It takes up a lot of precious characters, but I'm going to tag my Bond tweets #bondread. I don't have a lot of time for reading so this could be a very long and drawn out process. The good news is it'll be easy to catch up if you jump in late. The tweets may not be comprehensive, but maybe they'll be entertaining enough that you'll be tempted to read the books.

THERE WILL BE SPOILERS! But, shit, you've had like fifty years to read these things!

We'll be reading chronologically. This, according to the Big W:

* 1953 Casino Royale
* 1954 Live and Let Die
* 1955 Moonraker
* 1956 Diamonds Are Forever
* 1957 From Russia, with Love
* 1958 Dr. No
* 1959 Goldfinger
* 1960 For Your Eyes Only
* 1961 Thunderball
* 1962 The Spy Who Loved Me
* 1963 On Her Majesty's Secret Service
* 1964 You Only Live Twice
* 1965 The Man with the Golden Gun
* 1966 Octopussy and The Living Daylights

Jump in! Swim around! It will be an epic adventure in miniature. We may all come to the end of it and discover that we've become worse human beings. You may also discover that Fleming's Bond is a bit more human than Hollywood's.

See you there!

Wednesday, July 28, 2010

The Milkman

Welcome to new follower Mike! Scoot over, everyone!

Not sure why anyone would want to, but I just added some sharey buttons to the bottom of each post. So go share.

There's got to be someone out there who hasn't seen this. Of course, those people may not know what a milkman is:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IJZM3X4dpzo&videos=TYclA49_y3s

Wednesday, July 14, 2010

Billy's Picture Book

Illustration by Rudy Rucker

Billy's Picture Book has been released and the e-book is available online for free! It collects 13 Billy Stories by Terry Bisson and is Illustrated by Rudy Rucker. These are wonderful, funny, creepy tales of a kid caught between two mundane, strict parents and fantastic creatures with bad attitudes. Get it here:

http://www.rudyrucker.com/billysbook/

Two of these stories are available in audio from from StarShipSofa, narrated magnificently by Gareth Stack. Gareth's readings, coupled with the stories themselves, had me cackling with glee. Two of my best Sofa experiences ever. And that includes with girls. Check them out here:

Billy and the Wizard
http://www.starshipsofa.com/20080821/aural-delights-no-38-kage-baker/

Billy in Dinosaur City
http://www.starshipsofa.com/20090916/starshipsofa-aural-delights-no-100/

Go!